This box is important-- but i have a few other boxes with my first scribbles, alphabets, spelling tests, and report cards (O for Outstanding, E for Excellent, A for average... we all know the drill). More boxes for later in my life with National Latin Exam scores, voice recital programs, my first auto CAD projects, PSAT and SAT scores, clippings from the local newspaper about pole vaulting, college recruitment letters, acceptance letters. And of course, nothing beat that hole-in-stomach feeling of stress when I opened the email or snail mail after 12 short years of school to determine a huge part of my future. I have finished that part of my life, I have over achieved. So now what?
What is an overachiever supposed to do during the summer when relaxing time has to be been penciled in. When I try to relax a little bit, I think of what I could be doing to get ahead. It is very hard for me to have more than a 2 week break in productivity. I carry my moleskin "brain" with me 24-7 and during the summer time, I fill my to-do lists with get more books at the library, watch harry potter 5 for the third time and call so-and-so. They are not important lists and a part of me wishes the list could say, "wake up at 5, study for this test". Is that weird? I love to learn, and I hate sitting around. This is what those boxes have created. I don't know if its a good thing or not yet, but those boxes define everything I have done. Now there will be less things to put in a box, but more to be put into a brain, a life, a real future. These boxes started something that won't be finished any time soon. Because I have those boxes I have the ability to fill new hypothetical boxes. Unfortunately, these box filling activities have been put on hold for another month. But i'll still give it a try.
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